Eureka!

ding! a bell rang in my head. I scurried down the stairs into the living room carrying the book of code. no. nothing. not a stir. running back into the room sitting comfortably.. then EUREKA! i definitely had this sense of feeling HIGH! no drugs, no alcohol. sobber. i figured it all out. A LAST! My time finally came!!! after 4 long years of waiting. something or should i say someone has finally became "available"?? yes. now i definitely remember the feelings, well thoughts perhaps... when i would see the visions of a future. its something thats always been in the back of my head, but ive never been able to, more like given the chance to, let it seep out. At last... but i sure do hope its mutual... now comes the hardest part of it all. The Wait. that is all i can say.

at 11.12PM we, Elaine Bay, Brandon Carr and I, have established that we would become the 3 Amigos. Seeing as to we're always left out of the "happenings" and pretty much lost touch with the close friends. So instead.. we will be great friends because we say what's on our heads. As if i dont do that already. Ive always figured that it's best to say it than to let it linger in your head, slowly eating you up. Ive been down that old road and it was not pretty.

Ive changed. I know i have and i will be a first to admit that. Yes, people change, and not just physically. Im not gonna go off and say that only my friends have changed. because i know for a fact that i have changed as well. I am no longer that shy person who hides behind the crowd. i want all eyes on me. yes. i am bold. i am blunt. i am bitchy and annoying. but do i care. NO. i refuse to let it get to me because i am who i am today because of the bullshit experiences ive gone through since day 1. if you say something.. i will say something back.. as simple as that. no more. none. i will see you all in the future... and will be the first to say.. YES, IVE CHANGED...